In the past year, two people I knew passed away and both of their Facebook pages were memorialized.
One of the two was a 20 year-old woman who I had only hung out with 2 or 3 times through a mutual friend when she passed away. As you know, I'm not a huge Facebook person so we hadn't yet become friends on Facebook. Her page was memorialized and since I wasn't friends with her, I couldn't search for her profile on Facebook. I wanted to look her up. See her pictures. See what people were writing to her. I wanted to appreciate a person I had enjoyed hanging out with, someone I could have become good friends with. I wanted to write something to her, let her know in some cyber phantom world that I regret us not meeting earlier. I feel like because of the way Facebook has decided to memorialize pages I'm cut out of that group.
The other person was a 20 year-old man who I had gone to elementary and middle school with but hadn't ever been extremely close to. His name was one I'll never forget, with a face to go along with it. He is someone I've grown up with although not someone I'd necessarily call a friend. We were friends on Facebook but when he passed I felt I was again, cut out of knowing the person as they were at 20 years-old. I couldn't see his interests, I couldn't see his groups, I couldn't see his photo albums. I could see the photos he was tagged in and his wall which was really nice because I was able to see what he had been up to since middle school. I was also able to write a message of thought and love to him and his family on his wall.
I understand there has to be guidelines on what happens with a memorialized Facebook page but personally in both of these instances it makes it more difficult for me to agree with them.
I feel the same way! Most of the people who I am friends with on Face book have requested me (mainly because I am too lazy to find and request them myself!), so when a distanced friend died I was unable to see any of the love and support that was expressed on his facebook page. While I think that it is good that Face book blocks hundreds of people who do not know him in an attempt to protect his privacy, I also think there should be more of a filter so that those were actually friends with him (in reality and not facebook) can somehow see their page. Maybe by allowing people close to the deceased to access their account and accepting friend requests.
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